The Pursuit of Happiness

Been a while hasn't it? I'd say welcome back but we all know that no one is desperate enough to continue to come back to this site. So instead I'll start of with a friendly 'hello' and hope that what I'm probably going to write right now will seem interesting enough for you to spend a couple of minutes on.

So earlier this week results came out. Now these aren't your regular end of term 'next-time-I'll-do-better' results, this is the real life-deciding deal; and for many of us they weren't what we expected. So now how do we deal with that? I could stand here spouting all sorts of bull crap about how things will get better, and of how life has set you on a new better path, but we all know that I'll be wasting your time with complete and utter nonsense.

Let's face it. This sucks. Definitely if your future was suddenly taken away from you, you wouldn't want consolation. You'd want to smash things; curse the world for being cruel; maybe even go on a wild rampaging spree... anything basically besides listen to someone tell you that it's probably for the best.

As a person who's been on both sides of the roads I know how frustrating it is from either point of view. If you're the one being consoled, you're seriously considering ripping out the throat of the one consoling you. If you're the one consoling, you know that if it were you in the opposite person's position, you wouldn't even wait around to listen to your shit.

So now what? Well to me I feel there are 3 stages that people in this situation go through.

First is grief - The eternal sadness of not achieving your dreams has finally hit you. Waves of guilt, vulnerability and most of all pain overcome you. You seem lost for a few moments as you contemplate 'what now?'. The thing that hurts most probably is if you're a self conscious person like me, you will always wonder whether people will now view you as a failure. This is your biggest challenge that you'll face, and you have to overcome it if you even plan on moving on

Next is blame - You've finally accepted your current situation and now you're on the warpath looking for someone to blame for what has happened. Maybe it's your friends who insisted you keep on partying late into the night. Or your parents for taking you out constantly when you felt you should have studied. Lets be honest (say the first two words fast) you are the own freaking boss of your destiny. Do not forget that you agreed to most of these things whether knowingly or not. Call it peer pressure, family pressure or any other pressure, you gave into it rather focus on your goals and now you're paying the price. When you finally realize this, you'll seriously wish that the price wasn't so high.

Finally is revival - This stages could come frequently in-between the other two former stages, but you'll know it's real when you finally start to let go. When you decide that enough-is-enough and moping around won't help anyone, you've finally started the healing process. What is soon to follow is the desire to do better. Changes to your lifestyle could either be radical or they could be slow and progressing. Whatever they may be it is important to realize that these changes do not guarantee success in the future. They could be obliterated as you settle back into your old habits, or simply not strong enough to make a difference. However they are something you're willing to try out for the time being. Therefore you've opted to take a different path, preferably a brighter one as you move out of the shadows and back into the sunlight.

So now that I've basically written out my life-story in these few paragraphs I'm hoping you'll at least be able to relate with me and what I'm talking about. True, disappointment sucks but you're only making it worse by letting it take a hold of you. We're only human for god's sake. Mistakes are bound to happen but that doesn't me that we let them take us down. We simply get up, dust ourselves off, and get back on the trail to find happiness.

In all honesty, the 'pursuit of happiness' is a battle, and if you're not fighting, then it isn't happiness that you're looking for.

Big Chapters Are Sometimes Hard To Close

Been a while since I wrote a post so I thought that it'd be nice to return with a banger of a piece. Now that I've embarrassed myself by saying the word 'banger' (that and the fact that I couldn't spell embarrassed without spell-check) lets get on with what probably is going to be a sad post.

See I even give warnings before starting my piece so that at least you have a heads up for what you're probably going to get yourself into. So now that you've foolishly decided to continue reading perhaps it's time that I actually started talking about today's topic instead of dilly dallying around.

Okay so a while back I wrote a post regarding the tiny chapters in our life. The little mini memories that aren't significant enough to cause any change, but are still worth remembering. Chapters like school trips, summer memories, fights with random people... the list goes on.

However this is different. There are times when major changes occur in your life; Changes you may not expect; Changes you may not event want. Yet they will occur and when they do it's best to realize it, rather than foolishly try and fight for something that was lost long ago.

Sounding rather cryptic aren't I? Well sometimes the closer you look the less you see (Yes I ripped that line off from 'Now You See Me'). Anyways getting back to the original topic. There will be a point when you will find yourself wondering how on Earth did you end up in this situation, with the walls backed up against you and the suffocation setting it. It is at that point that you know you're done, and maybe it's time to sign off from this part of your life.

Sometimes though you don't have control of how a chapter ends. While the norm is for you to have veto power as to how and when a chapter concludes; what happens when someone shuts it for you? In most sense, I as a person know how that feels, and let me tell you, it isn't a good feeling.

Sadly what can you do? Wishing things were different probably won't help; Fighting to keep something that has already ended won't help either. In fact probably the easiest thing to do is to just let go. When you bow to the inevitable, the inevitable becomes the expectation. You knew this would happen and when it did you prepared yourself for it. Perhaps things didn't happen the way you expected them to, but they did for a reason. Now while I'm sorta insane and don't actually know what that reason is, I do know that eventually I will learn to accept it.

To round off what is sure to be either a very confusing or incredibly clear post to all of you out there, let me say this; A chapter is a chapter for a reason, when one begins to close, it signals the start of a new one. So I guess all I have to do is wait now; wait for my next chapter to start.

To apologize for the inconvenience I may have caused by depressing you with this post, here's a Pikachu eating a lollipop. Cheers!