Dealing with double sides

Ever wondered why you act differently when you're around people? No? Seriously does nobody think about these things at all? Ah well I do, and as long as I continue to do so, you're all suctioned into listening to what many people (nearly everyone) say is absolute bull crap. Still as they say, "Better to have some crap rather than none at all". Okay I have definitely broken the weird scale now. On with the post.

So lately (well basically right now) I've been thinking of how our attitude/personality/whatever the hell defines us, changes as we interact with different people. I've been the soft spoken, shy and inbound child; the over zealous and annoying boy wonder; the chilled out trophy kid; and most of all I've been the person no one forgets. Aren't I adorable? No I thought so. Just remember... I know where you live -_-

Moving on. I find myself wondering whether or not we have any control as to which personality we choose to first introduce ourselves with when meeting people. Like say you're like me and you're born with multiple personality disorder; what's your go-to personality? Frankly I tend to shift in between them depending on how the person I'm interacting with, appears

Now you've probably gotten the general gist of what I previously mentioned, but just for convenience sake, I'm going into this a little bit more deeper. They say that in the social circuit, there are four roles that are most common; there's the Alpha, the one with the prominent personality who takes the role of the leader; the Beta, who isn't respected by all but is valued by the Alpha as the person to go to for advice; the Sideliner, who are quite content being part of the group and find no need to jump positions, and finally there's the Bandwagon who loves to be around Alphas and will jump cliques if they find someone interesting enough.

After that rather complicated revealing, let me mix things up even further and see if you can take it. You know like I said we change our personality depending on the person we're interacting with... well that personality is one of these roles superimposed on us according to whether we think the other person is an Alpha, Beta, Sideliner or Bandwagon.

Take for instance the person you're about to meet seems charismatic, fun and sociable. Naturally you perceive them to be either an Alpha or a Beta and accordingly you decide whether you want to adopt a more outgoing role of the current social clique, or stay in the shadows until you feel comfortable.

See that's the problem. So many times I've met people who seem completely nice at one point of time, and the next moment when you're surrounded by different people he/she is a complete asshole. Not sure why that happens, and truthfully I've played the same role as these people many times. I guess it's just natural for us humans to change how we behave based on our perception of the other person. Hmm seems kinda pointless seeing as we're all part of the same washed up species. Ah well, we humans have a tendency of never learning. Maybe though in the future things will change. Till then here's hoping I don't adopt another random ass personality. I think 3 is enough.

Mini Chapters & Their Significance

So today I thought that it'd be nice to skip the formalities and get straight into the topic at hand...

They say that every individual we meet during the path of our existence influences us in someway. Whether by teaching us a new lesson, showing us an unusual experience or simply by saying hi to us on a sad day. Yet there are over 7 Billion people on this planet so clearly the people we encounter and the friends we make are a mere micro-fraction of those that surround our life. However for now I'd like to focus on the minor chapters of our lives; the ones that may last only for a couple of months but we still look back upon them with longing of moments past and time well spent.

So now what is a 'Mini Chapter'? Well clearly it can have a different meaning to all of you out there reading this (thanks mom for reading this) but to me it's all about friendship and those brief encounters with people that suddenly seem to disappear as fast they did appear.

Bear with me as I get knee deep in complicated ideas. So over the past few days a couple of really unfortunate things happened (I'm a dick in short) and that got me going through all of my old conversations I've had with people on the various social media platforms I'm part of (Life? I have none). What I found is that over time I've made so many new temporary friends; people I've spoken to, bonded with, even considered friends, and then out of the blue suddenly the conversations stop and it's like they never existed in the first place. Now it's not like I'm complaining or anything. These moments are just a natural part of your life. While insignificant to you when you consider the big picture, there are times when the memories come back and you revel in the fondness of the past. They come and go as they please, but each of them add a new page to your book...sometimes maybe even two. I'm sure all of you have suddenly gotten really close to someone and then randomly they vanished from your life...right? God let me not be the only one going through this *Awkward*.

Wow I lost my train of thought again. Guess that means that this post is over... OR DOES IT?
No really I'm done. Stay loose random strangers who read this, maybe someday you'll be a chapter as well.

I Found Something Louder Than Words

Ironic that I'm writing about this? Yes? No? Oh... you don't care. Well I didn't think that you did anyways. Still it's nice that you're hear, so maybe read the rest of this now that you've already started.

With the development of Social Media platforms, written communication has become the most sought out form of communication, action or interest. People can do virtually anything online and frankly all of us have been affected by the magical wonders of the internet. So naturally that got me thinking, what happened to reality? Have we become so engrossed in the cyber world that we've begun to shun physical interaction? I don't think I have the answer for that but the thought still kind of scares me.

Anyways what I wanted to talk to you people about was in fact real life. I swear to you I've literally been through this situation wherein I find it easier to talk to a person via social media platforms rather than in real life. This is mainly cause I get really awkward during conversation gaps, and I unfortunately speak faster than a jack rabbit on fire. For those of you who didn't get that last reference... I speak fast -_-.

So now you're probably wondering what's wrong with virtual means of communication? Well for starters I've sorta forgotten how to actually have a decent prolonged conversation with a person. I mean aside from a few close friends, the only way I really get to know someone is through whatsapp where I mindlessly drive them crazy (sorry). Also until recently where a certain *annoying* friend forced me to talk to them on the phone, I was completely anti-phone conversation. This actually had been a life long thing and normally I'm quite afraid of actually picking up the phone and calling someone to just randomly talk to them. Still I learned and I can honestly say I'm not that afraid anymore... I now have a new fear of not knowing when to shut up when talking to someone (oh the problems in life).

Really I'm sure that this post will have no significance to you for you may be quite frankly happy with how you presently interact with others. Well I'm not; I don't think that simply chatting through your phones can help you actually get to know the person... So for now I guess I've found something louder than words.

How Awks can Awkward get?

Okay so for the first time I've given some indication of what I've decided to write about today. I mean unless you're blind or suffering from the social disease of popularity, then you know what it's like to feel awkward.

Speaking as a true aficionado of this glorious emotion I have over the years accumulated many an awkward situation. Birthday parties where you know no one. Meeting a person after ignoring their last message to you on whatsapp.  Worst of all I believe is when you accidentally make fun of someone who's right next to you and they hear what you're saying. Oh the memories :')... they'll haunt me forever.

So today while reveling in those glorious moments, a curious thought came upon me. How awkward can being awkward get? I mean what defines the upper limit of an awkward situation. I remember this birthday party of a friend of mine where all the guests would cling to each other in separate groups leaving this one guy completely by himself. No strangely that wasn't me (I'm amazed myself) and weirdly I could understand how the guy was feeling. Nobody likes to be left out... especially when you're the only one who is.

Hmm, what other situations have I been in where my awkward meter was off the charts... Oh yes the time when I found out that a friend of mine whom I had trusted with an incredibly 'never to be disclosed' secret went stark crazy and told the whole world. The fact that that person freely admitted to telling it made the whole situation even more awkward. I mean it's like I'm telling you to not stab yourself and the next second the knife is through your ventricular arteries (Science Bitch).

What's weird is that compared to a girl, a guy's awkward situation barely scratch the surface of how bad it get. Now I'm not saying that this rule applies to all females in general but the basic idea is that each day a woman somehow manages to wreck 4 lives and have her life wrecked 4 times as well... there's gotta be balance somewhere.

So now I'm curious, suppose there's a big chart somewhere out there that shows how awkward your situation can be on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being social hell. Now I have a couple of ideas of what could constitute a 10 but then I wouldn't want my account to be banned for explicit language. Till the time that freedom of press actually becomes a thing I guess I'll catch you later.

Btw a friend of mine told me about a show named Awkward. The name came to me just as I finished writing this post... Awks.

Sometimes Mood Swings Rock!

I'm Happy! My god, joy is in the world today.

Until you came into it and I decided I hate your face and the entire world that surrounds it.

Maybe I'm  hungry for love... or a bowl of pasta? This is really confusing isn't it?

Body, seriously MAKE UP YOUR MIND! Either I'm happy or sad, good or bad, freaky or mad. This has got to stop. Erm only problem is... how do I do that?

So if you haven't guessed by that rather interesting first paragraph ^  and the obvious title (seriously you must be blind) I'm talking about mood swings. They say that being a teenager is a lot like having 5 different people inside you at the same time. Pardon the sexual references but I couldn't think of any other metaphor and so this is all I've got.

Seriously though it's kind of funny how literally the smallest things can lead to a dramatic change in personality for a short period. It's like playing Mario and you suddenly eat the mushroom that makes you shoot bullets from your body. Okay so maybe not exactly like that but you get what I'm saying... right?

Take for instance yesterday when I broke into the house's chocolate storage and after a perilous struggle (easy-open my ass) I finally unlocked a new box of Galaxy chocolates and went to town on that thing;okay I had three but it counts okay. Anyways right after that sugar-styled ecstasy I sorta got a sugar high and for half an hour my mind went into overdrive. I mean I think I messaged 12 different people I've never spoken to before in my life, poked 6 different friends and read an entire lifetime's worth of tips on how to reduce hair fall for guinea pigs (don't judge me). Even  today when I was feeling low after yesterday's energy burst, the song 'Pump It' by the Black Eyed Peas came on and I randomly burst into hysterical laughter. For those of you questioning my sanity (come on I know you all do), the reason why I lost it was that I couldn't get the video of the baby dancing to that song out of my head; seriously check it out on YouTube, it is definitely worth it.

Funny how random things cause us to change our moods right? I guess that proves to show how unpredictable life can be. So this post goes out to all the freaks like me who can't control there emotions and know what I'm talking about. *Sigh*, it feels good to be a teenager.... at least for now I can blame it on the hormones.