When did we suddenly grow up?

Warning - Reading of this post may potentially waste away 5 minutes of your precious day filled with stuff which you planned on doing but probably will end up cancelling.

Okay so once again I've been feeling the mood to write so I thought why not tackle a little issue that I'm sure a few people have been feeling lately or least are itching to talk about. The past few weeks back home in Dubai and this last year in general has been a bit of an eye-opener for me. I got more interested in job applications than what my juniors were doing, swapped day long naps with an evenly (read 'evenly') balanced scheduled and weirdly enough stopped caring so much what some people thought of me. Arguments over stupid things seemed like an irritation that I'd rather avoid and in all honesty I got bored quite fast of what the entire world was up to. When on Earth did I ever start self-reflecting? God knows but I kinda like it. Anyway getting back to point of the ever impending change of our teenage lives.

I'm probably being a hypocrite for writing this but then, it's my blog so what are you going do? Still writing helps me think clearly so I felt it useful that I at least give this piece a shot.

So now for the few of you out there who are like me and seem to find life amidst transition what exactly are you feeling? To me growing up meant the freedom to leave the house at 1:30 in the morning, drive really fast to the beach and just sit down and stare at the ocean. Now typically you'd need a set of extraordinarily trusting parents and a car with an amazing sound system to basically blast your music into. It also meant the change of actually knowing what was right and wrong when it came to making decisions. I started trusting my instincts more and knew that the opinions I held, flawed to say the very least, were at least honest based on how I felt. Focus became an important issue and I desired to take more of life in rather than aimlessly watch the days fly by. True my daily routine got hectic, tiring and I often felt overworked, but I loved every sweat inducing moment of it.

In all honesty I wrote this post to challenge the minds of those who may be still within that cycle of leaving a part of their lives behinds and beginning a new one. What do you feel you need to give up? What exactly brought you down? Did the things you did matter so much?

So a friend of mine lately brought up this rather disturbing piece of news that I won't get into but it somehow drifted towards me turning 20 in a few months time. Now most people are genuinely terrified about entering a new era of their lives but to me it weirdly seems like a welcome change right now. Maybe it's because when I look back at the past 19 years of my life, the problems I've faced, the person I used to be and genuinely what I've become I can confidently say, at least to myself, childhood well spent.

Now if you can give me a chance to go through a bit of a memory trip, I have a little challenge for you. Take out a little piece of paper and jot down the numbers 10 - 19 on it. For each year write down one defining moment in your life be it good or bad and appreciate the fact that you're still standing after all of it. If you can do that, then trust me when I say this, it's going to be alright. For the younger ones, try and fill up till the point where you are right now and aim to fill each remaining space with a memory that actually will withstand the passage of time. For you, the greatest gift of all is what can be.

Well that's probably all I have to talk about right now. I mean it's not much but I kinda like how my thoughts seem to spell themselves out into words. It seems to make everything, a lot more human...

Till next time.

Pushing the Boundaries

Okay so two thoughts. This post could be immensely insightful and talk about how people need to challenge themselves beyond the necessary and strive for success. Yet that topic is rather overplayed and something I find completely pointless to talk about, seeing as everyone wants the best for themselves. So today I felt that I'd talk about something I feel rather strongly about and what most people go through themselves when they simply... push the boundaries of friendship.

God that sentence was so overplayed it's not even funny. Still now that I've brought it up, you might as well sit down and listen.

They say the human mouth is incapable of staying shut for long periods of time (I should know) and when we speak without realising, it often doesn't bode well for us. Thousands of relationship have been ruined by a simple 'slip of the tongue', more so in today's day than ever. People all around are listening to what you say and therefore your every view, every word, every opinion comes under constant scrutinising by those you interact with. They dispel your originality, dampen your creativity and block you ingenuity. They are the barriers that hold you back.  

So now how does this all make sense with the what I mentioned in that cheesy first paragraph? Well more often than not it's your friends who builds those barriers. Shooting down your weird but often creative ideas are a given task set by all of those around you. Now while I'm sure that more often than not they mean no legitimate harm and are simply looking out for you. Still if that were always the case then I wouldn't be writing this article now would I?

There are moments, rare moments when you need to give yourself the final decision. Stick to your values for once and don't be swayed by what others think. Having friends is good, but having control of your own life is even better. You need to be able to instil that desire to accept the views of others but remain firm against your own. Simply changing yourself to suit those around you simply delays the chance to express yourself freely. As a person you're both the greatest opponent and greatest support to yourself. When you take to heart what others feel you become your own downfall. It's a bit like defeating yourself before the battle has even begun. I'm liking the expression 'motivational suicide'.

A few weeks ago I realised that despite coming this far in life I still have a lot to learn. I need to stand up for myself once in a while or I'm simply giving in to the idealisms of others. Life is unique to each individual and we should never compromise on our individuality or we risk losing the identity that we perceive of ourselves. There will be times when those close to you will break you down to the the bare foundation that you hold as your own; do not be set back. Get up and rebuild.

The time will come when the joys of life exist in a place that you feel at one with. When you look back and see how much you've grown and realise that you're happy.

The beginning of a new journey

Kinda weird isn't it?

I've been at university for nearly two months now and I'm finally getting down towards writing this post. Guess I just felt the time was right. So for now, forgive me for the sudden absence and perhaps read what I've got to say about my new life.

Nothing, repeat nothing prepares you for what life at university really is. Be it staying up till 4 am talking about god knows what or living on a diet of chocolate, I've seen both the best and worst of living an individual life here at Warwick. Let me tell you one thing though, you will never regret a single moment of it, that much I promise you. 

University is where you find yourself, honestly speaking. High school is your final test of strength, the desire to succeed pushes you forward and then suddenly you've found yourself amongst the most amazing people you'd ever imagine meeting. I thought I'd miss my family back home at dubai, my best-friend/brother and of course my amazing sister, little did I think that I'd be getting a new one here. 

My family here at Warwick is a lot like me, guess that's the benefit of college, you find your place with people just like you. There's Harsh, who despite all the rather disturbing jokes about 'fiery penetration' is one of the nicest people I've ever met. By nice I mean he's insane like me, and that is a quality I really value. I've got my clean-freak/ workaholic buddy Aashna who for the love of god needs to stop complaining about every restaurant she eats in. I guarantee you that wherever she goes, she always finds something wrong. Perfectionist complextion maybe! Still, she's part of the puzzle, and without her we're really incomplete. Finally there's  Lasya, my former roomie ( FYI her room looked like a South Indian bomb exploded right in the centre ) and drama companion. Lasya is really, really, really weird, and I mean that in the best way possible. She hates chocolate, so officially she can be listed as psychotic. She also loves to eat stuff then whine about it. I mean maybe it's a girl thing, cause my sister does that as well, but god people food is food. I would like to point out though that I kinda need Lasya to make sure that I don't go mentally insane over here, she's sorta my stress reliver. 

Yeah I suck at explaining, but that's my family in general, cousins and all will come later but for now we're the fail four taking on the perils of UNi together.

... And honestly I wouldn't have it any other way 

Elevation to the Nth Degree

'Don't be afraid to be different'

For it is your difference that will guide you through the hardships you shall face

The pain that once bound you to so many evil things will be released

And you will rise your head towards a brighter future.

A simple thought isn't it? Yet words are only the shell of the big picture, seeing as our actions determine how we fill that shell. True in the end all evil will be vanquished and good with reign victorious. What matters is how much we have to give up to reach that point. Happiness... Most people think they have it, but few have ever been able to understand it.

As a child let me tell you there were few things in the world that brought me happiness. My family and my own world was what I'd escape to when the demons of my insecurities would take control, and I'd hide, miserably ashamed of who I was and what had brought me to this Earth. Yet as I grew so did my desire to find that elusive emotion of happiness. Weirdly enough I had to only begin searching for it when I realized where it was.

Now happiness to me is not something that can be granted so easily. However once earned, I do everything in my power to ensure that I never let go of it. So now the questions remains, what is happiness? What is that sheer emotion of bliss? Where can I find that emotion of pure elation? The answer strangely enough is synonymous to the person who desires it. Only he or she will know what makes them happy, and therefore only they can set the path in motion to achieve it.

To me happiness is a number of things. Making new friends, and more often than not, helping them. Having the perfect day. Being loved by all. Most importantly, I find great joy in learning, especially those life lessons that I keep to myself, for only I know how valuable they are.

What's strange is that I'm writing this post with the feeling of utmost elation. The kind a good song can give to you after a hard day of downfalls. Yet even though I've written so much, I feel as if I've barely scratched the surface of what truly this emotions means to some of us. So I ask this to you in conclusion. Stop what you're doing right now, and think about what makes you happy... You'll be surprised by how remembering will bring you so much joy.

Why I'd make a good story teller

So I was reminiscing like usual, thinking about old times and how much they meant to me when I suddenly realized... I can remember shit! Pardon the language but like most people I've met tend to forget nearly everything beyond the last week of their existence. Now I'm not talking about major stuff but rather simplistic stuff; stuff that people forget... Stuff that I weirdly remember.

Acha getting back to the main point. I've come to the conclusion that when it comes to retelling past events, I've got the whole ' Remember that one time...' thing down pat. This is mainly because I love telling stories and freaking people out by all the awkward stuff I remember, and secondly I cherish those memories more than anything else in the entire world (wow that sounded so lame). So as I treat for you people, I thought I'd share a story with you all.

Now while I don't consider this an actual story I feel that it's still a significant part of my life and one I don't mind sharing with you... that and I can't think of anything remotely interesting to talk about. So now I'm pretty sure many of you out there know who Iggy is (in case you didn't he's a lethargic piece of fat that I call a guinea pig) and this is the story of how I got him. Now as I child I loved to blackmail people (still do sometimes) and that plus my re-collective memory meant that promising me anything while was young was a big mistake.

Our story starts 8 years ago when I was at the tender age of 10 (I wouldn't say tender since I was as round as a beach ball) and my family and I were driving out of town for a weekend of relaxation. Now while my mom went to visit the loo when we stopped for a break, I cornered my poor unsuspecting father (never try and outwit my mother). I said to him 'Dad I want a dog (note always ask for something more than what you expect)', to which he laughed in response. Then I played the classic 'cry as loud as you can' card, and the moment the waterworks went off my dad panicked. So to console me he said' Son when you're 14 we'll get you a dog', to which I responded 'Promise?' and then my father made the biggest mistake of his life by not realizing who he was dealing with when he said 'Yes'.

Flash-forward 4 years and my birthday is approaching. I'm like parents I want a dog for my birthday. My mom thinks I'm joking, and my dad seems to have forgotten his promise. However I didn't, and unfortunately my dad got the short end of the stick when he had to explain to my rather 'astounded' mother why on Earth I'd be getting a dog. However, my mom refused to budge on the whole not getting a dog so that meant only one thing... I'd have to get bribed. Now when I get bribed, I get paid off big time. So for that simple promise I made 4 years ago, I was bequeathed a brand new laptop and a tiny pet of my choice (I'm evil I know).

Now the dilemma came up as to what on Earth should I get as my new found companion. I despise birds because I can't pick them up, and cats are a bit too violent for my taste, so the only adorable thing remaining was my beloved guinea pigs. Next came choosing one. When you to go the pet store looking for rodents there are two situations that are most likely to occur. Either they'll have tons of freshly shipped in babies (that sounded wrong as well) or they'll have none at all. I weirdly enough went somewhere in the middle where only a few of the tiny little hairballs were remaining, and that is where I saw him. The tiniest in the lot, his orange colored fur stood out like a warning symbol. What my mom liked about him the most was that literally anything on this Earth would scare him shitless.

Pardon the language but that's actually true and so she thought that he'd be the most harmless for me. Strange enough I knew, that when I held him in my arms, his tiny paws reaching up to my neck, that he was definitely the one for me... And thus I wound up with my first ever guinea pig, though more were soon to follow.

That brings us to the end of our rather weird and maybe sorta retarded story. I'm not sure if it was interesting or not but I definitely had fun reliving the moment, and it was nice to write something other than a depressing emotional post. Who knows maybe if my friends pester me enough (hint hint) I'll write another story for you guys... perhaps one that's more juicier next time.

Change and why you miss the past

I've probably lost my mind right about now by taking on a topic so vast and unforgiving, but yet I feel that at least to me writing is the only way that I'll remember what I've learnt over the years. True to the point change is by far one of the most terrifying things a person can experience. What's even scarier is that usually we don't realize it.

I came upon this 'nugget' of information when I glanced upon (okay stalked) the ways in which so many of us have evolved from what we once were. Some like me have escaped from the suffocating shell of the lives we once led. Others have taken on a new personality that gives them the potential to be what their parents always knew they had inside of them.

So then why do I catch myself reminiscing about the past? Why does looking at old photos bring such a smile to my face? Truth is I don't really know.

They say human beings were put on this Earth to evolve. Yet why do our parents keep on wishing for the good old days? You know it's funny of how while writing this post the answer suddenly came to my lips, but I'll save that for later.

Now many of us can only see change as a physical aspect, something that seems different to us. True while in many cases changing one's inner-self may lead to a drastic change in our appearance, that is not always the case. In fact many a time I look back at my old photos wondering who I've become in these past few years . Can I honestly say, without a moments hesitation that I am better of than when I once was? 

True change is inevitable and life does need to go on, but consider the fact that time is endless and without consent it will  carry on. The trick though is how to utilize it. As I said earlier there is a reason out parents yearn for the good old days of their childhood... It's the only proof they have of a life well spent